Hi, My name is Becky Williams, wife to Ken and mom, mom, mom, MOM to Slade, Maddox, and Harbor Kate.
My passion is to help mothers thrive in their motherhood, not just survive.
Being a mother is the most rewarding yet challenging job you will ever face. It can be terrifying to hold your little human in your arms and realize you are responsible for every aspect of their well being. (GULP)
Taking the stress out of your mommy to do lists such as meal planning, house cleaning, self care and parenting and implementing easy to follow, easy to understand steps to get it all done (without losing. your. ever. loving. mind.), is what drives me to bring you content week after week.
Grab a cup of your favorite coffee (MMMM…Pecan Praline by Community Coffee), in your favorite mug (Rae Dunn that says Lovely) put on a pair of fuzzy socks and let’s chat!
Here’s my story….
It is 11pm. The dishes are piled high, clothes seem to be growing from all corners of the house. I feel like I should be updating my website, emailing my clients, following up with last minute details on a work project, preparing for my class next week, checking on how the boys are progressing in school, looking up more DIY recipes to save money on cleaning products or researching how to make more flavorful and healthy meals for my kids.
My head is going in so many different directions because all of the other aspects of my life are falling through. I just want to go to bed or sit in a hot bath…alone… with no one staring at me or needing me for something.
My phone flashes and says that I am behind on my Bible reading and I see a half read book on the night stand about building a stronger marriage. I just want it to stop.
The responsibilities are piling on and so is my weight. I am exhausted all the time, cry at the drop of a hat and feeling hopeless. My temper is short, my energy is low, my voice gets too loud and my anxiety level is through the roof.
Have you ever been there? If you have, you are not alone.
As I sat on the cold kitchen floor, soaked in tears, I began reminiscing about the moment when I stopped being so diligent with my health and emotional wellness.
Not only were my kids more snappy, fighting Ken and I about everything, acting up in school, not wanting to eat what I cooked, etc, but they just didn’t seem like their regular happy selves.
Ken and I’s conversations had become limited to “small talk” and lacked any real meaning. I realized that the stress of me feeling like I needed to be supermom was taking a toll on everyone. I decided right then and there that this mama had to change things drastically! It wasn’t that I lacked the right tools, support or time…it was that I didn’t have systems in place.
I decided to jump in with both feet, because, well, face it…I was already hitting rock bottom emotionally, physically and spiritually. I started with one simple goal for myself.
Here is what I did.
I started my research on what would help me to feel better in my body and mind. I knew that I wasn’t getting enough nutrients from the foods that I was eating (or not eating at all). I cut dairy out of my diet completely (after finding out that Harbor Kate had a dairy sensitivity), and I upped my water intake as well. I began getting up earlier than my babies (around 4 or 5am) and scheduled all of my posts for the day, wrote my blog posts and followed up on any emails. The minute that my kids woke up, it was OUR time. I poured them a cup of coffee milk and just chatted about whatever was on their minds until it was time to get ready for school.
I also starting having the boys be more responsible for chores in the house. (This is the chore chart I used.) Sure the dishes took longer, but they were LEARNING and having fun instead of whining. I noticed that I had more patience as well as endurance when the kids were having a bad day. On the days I woke up at the same time as the kids, I noticed a HUGE drop in my mood. I felt I was unproductive, frustrated and down. (And the house reflected that for sure!)
Establishing a morning routine made all the difference in the world.
First thing in the morning was my prayer and devotions time (with coffee, of course). I’d start a load of clothes washing and unload the dishwasher. I’d then sneak away into my office to work on content for you guys. It is the time of day when I’m not distracted or interrupted. By around 6:30 the boys would come in and Harbor Kate would be hungry. After coffee time with boys is when my day started officially but I was LESS STRESSED.
Another thing that helped me, is TRELLO! I made a schedule and a Trello board where I could keep a master list instead of trying to hold everything in my head. Anytime I thought of something to do, I would add it to the TO-DO column, then continue with my day. Each morning, when setting the goals of the day, I would look at my master list and realistically decide what I could do that day and moved it to that column in Trello.
Making an effort to prioritize MY time and taking care of MY health has resulted in a more organized home, happier children, more fulfilling marriage, easier bed times as well as a more balanced ME.
As Allie Casazza says, I’m no longer counting down the minutes until bedtime (at least most days).
I hope you find this blog to be a safe place. A place for answers to your most frustrating problems. A place where you find systems and solutions to help you thrive in your motherhood. It is possible to enjoy these “early years” and not just get through them.
Here’s to YOU, Mom…you do MATTER!